Coworker Confrontation

Do You Just Want to Rip Their Head Off?

Well then you might be a better fit fighting for Mortal Kombat than your current position…

Yet if you just so desire to remain in your current employment, this is how we can resolve the matter in a more civilized manner. Then at the end of it, hopefully everyone  wins!

A few takeaways that you can start to think about are:

  • The longer you keep silent, the more animosity will grow.
  • Do your best not to explode a bomb on the person, they may have not the slightest clue of how you feel.
  •  How you feel matters.

Story Time

In my current line of work, i’ve ridden with many different types of people.
Some who first ask, “Does second hand smoke bother you?” To that I say, thank you for asking, yes it does bother me.
They respond, “Okay some people don’t like it, so I ask and I’ll wait till we park to smoke.”
Then there’s others that just smoke, some are just oblivious and others are just inconsiderate assholes that don’t care to consider the needs of others. Well don’t I sound mad…

How you respond to this situation is everything though, it’s best to make your needs known right off the back. Don’t try to see if you can put up with it.
Which I am guilty of, but since then i’ve realized the longer you put up with it. The more it aggravates you.
Then the bigger the confrontation about it will be, yet it doesn’t have to be a big deal.
Just calmly ask, “Hey do you mind not smoking in the vehicle?”

We want to feel good and happy in our life and we can’t do that when we’re riding in the car with someone that we’re angry with. So be cool.

I just made my request.

It went like this
Me: “Hey man, can I ask of a favor from you. Do you mind smoking before or after being in the car? It’s making me sick.”

Him: “Yes I do mind it’s the only time I get to smoke.”

Me: “Hey look i’m asking nicely.”

Him: “I know you are, but it’s been 5 years i’ve been working here and no one has ever had that problem. I’m not stopping.”

Me: “Okay.”

I’m not angry I didn’t get what I wanted, although he may be angered at my request.
That’s not my concern though, that just proves the point if he is angry that he’s an inconsiderate asshole. I need to care for myself. No one else will.

Imagine yourself this way. Your mind is the father, and your body is your child.
If you have literal kids, you’re going to tell them to stand up for themselves and you won’t have it if they’re given crap.

You are the father, stick up for your body.
We are all grown up children. We will continue to learn and thrive as we get better at this life. Love yourself as if you were your own child. Try it for just a week, and see how your life goes. I’m starting today.
Please let me know what your result is.

Back to the no smoking request; I wait to see what happens. Will there be a change of heart as thought is put into it? Well you know what… nothing changes.

It all comes down to this though.

My inconvenience or his during the car ride.

You know what I think I need?
What I need is either a new company or a new career if I’ll continue to be surrounded by people like this. I’m all about taking full responsibility for my life and thus it’s my fault i’m in a car with an inconsiderate asshole. What he needs is another inconsiderate asshole next to him.

People are like magnets, and we attract compatible people around us. In this case, i’m the one being pushed away.

It’s actually funny, but I wouldn’t say it’s coincidental.
People at the supply houses where many companies stop by are talking to me, and they’re in a great mood like I am. It’s not surprising, we can create our reality. With my current company It’s not like my pay is great here anyways, so why should I stay. I’m in need of moving up higher. This is why this post is kicking off the blog you are now reading, thank you for being here.

I refuse to not live at my highest purpose, I refuse to live pay check to pay check. I refuse to not be at my best health physically and mentally.

No one deserves less, although there are those that choose less like the person less than three feet away from me. So what am I going to do about my situation here at hand that you may share with me, and if you don’t I believe there are still many ways you can apply it to your life. Well i’ll have to escalate the situation. I’m going to my supervisor and will request that I no longer work with this person and my reason for it. If I do not get what I want, then I need to prepare to walk away. There will always be jobs for good honest hard working people. With people like him working for the company, I understand that the company does not value the persona of the person, or a good working atmosphere.

I only make $18.00 an hour.
That’s my fault too, i’ve chosen to go with a company that does not value me for the benefit i’m bringing to the company.

I hear people at walmart are making close to my wage, and what I do at work… well if we compare it, I get into some crap. It’s laborious intensive as well as requiring use of mental capacitance. What I do is  HVAC Installation. There is construction, and there is life risking danger involved. I’ll also be in over 100 degree attics, or spider and dead animal infested crawl spaces. Then ultimately on certain days risking killing myself for $18 an hour?

What am I even doing with my life?

What are you doing with your life?

What do you want from life?

Well go out and get it.

I know what I want, what I desire is for myself to refuse to live at such a low level surrounded by people that are not looking to live better.

What you surround yourself with, you ultimately become no matter how hard you resist. The best choice is taking your stand and walking away. You must become obsessed with the life you want. You must think about it constantly.

Imagine it.

Don’t let it make you anxious. You will attain the life you want. Already show gratitude for having the life you want. Because it is that assured that it will come to fruition.

Continue entelechy-ly.


The following morning before I have the chance to speak to management.
I get in the van with my colleague and I say right off the back with a strong inquisitive tone. “Are you going to smoke today?”

He responds: “Yes.”

In an irate tone I say: “OKAY.”

Him: “I don’t tell you how to live your life, no one has ever had this problem. What if your cologne bothered me, are you going to change it?”

Me: “Does it bother you?”

Him: “No, but i’m just showing you how this can keep on going on with having problems with something we do. And If you don’t like it you’ll have to tell the manager to move you.”

Me: “I will request to be moved with a different partner. This is the difference between you and I though, if something bothered you, like my cologne, I can skip wearing it. I’m not an inconsiderate asshole.”

Him: “Silence.”

Me: “Look man, I don’t have anything against you nor am I wanting you to change for me, all i’m asking is if you do it before or after the drive. I’m trying to work together here and if we can’t come to an agreement, then that’s fine we’re just not a good fit, you can work with another guy.”

Him: “It just caught me by surprise because it never seemed that you had a problem.”

Me: “I didn’t but it slowly amounted to one when I began noticing the physical affects it was taking on me.”

Him: “Okay i’ll hold off on the drives.

Me: “I really appreciate that, we’ll see how it goes because I understand why you smoke and how you feel if you don’t. If it works it works, but if it doesn’t then it’s all good man. We need what’s best for both of us.”

Then we continue with normal conversations.

I’m at a point of health where if i’m not feeling that i’m at the top, I hone in on what it is, and extract it out of my life. Smoking and the harm is quite obvious, although I was passive about it and I shouldn’t have been. Life can come at you in a way where you may tolerate things, but don’t. After this friday, the following week I was off on vacation. Upon my return I was promoted to an HVAC Technician and now drive my own van alone.

Sometimes things just work out, but things will always work out when you keep pushing.



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